onyxcarmine

Ah good old Nostalgia right? Well I'm not sure if I can count on you guys to relate to this, but tbh, this video actually hit me right in the feels.

I played Minecraft first on the Xbox 360 back in 2012 and had NO idea wtf I was doing. That was actually a really... really good time. Me and my friends would play for hours, building and fucking around for the whole summer. 

Now I realize that was 7 years ago. 

Don't even touch the game anymore. Not since everyone either got too busy with life or just lost interest. Ahhhh, good times :^)

Man, where did the time go?







Also edgy meme for good measure

You know what that means...

Seems like every time I think I've heard it all, the people in my life have a way of reminding me how proud they are of me and I realize that they're actually correct. 

I know this will seem like bragging, but it always brings a smile to my face at how far I've come as a person. The manager at the soup kitchen I still volunteer at every Saturday told me today just how proud she was of me for coming all this way, and still standing tall. She had a conversation earlier this week with my mother who actually told her lots of things and maybe even made her cry lol.

In October, I took the appropriate steps when it came to seizing a work-term in the Winter, which meant that I'd have to actually go to a place I didn't know, and talk to a person that I had no knowledge of or never met. This was new to me, and I was very nervous and anxious. 

Yet despite all of that, I faced it, and I succeeded in getting the job. Because I focused on it and got through it with determination. 

Now, as a teenager, this scared the shit out of me, and I'd have rather died than to do such a thing. I was very secluded for a majority of my life, choosing to stay inside and play videos games, watching tv, etc and blah blah blah. I mean it took me three and a half years after graduating high school to finally work up the courage to actually pull off such a task of reaching out to people I didn't know and asking them for a job.

Then I got my first car, little over a week ago. I wasn't sure if this was really happening, or what I'd do if I ever owned a car. However, again with the interview, I stepped out of my comfort zone, made the calls, talked to the dealer, and went to the bank to withdraw over $5400 on a cheque. I was very nervous and couldn't believe this was happening. Was I really going to own my first car?

It worked out! And the reason why is because I set my sights on it, and followed through.

And you can do that as well, though I'm pretty sure most of you aren't at that age yet. 

Take it from me. I was a loner throughout most of my school years. Didn't go to parties often. Hated socializing to the brim. Didn't start driving until I was 18 and barely did it until I was 19. Survived one of the most depressing and loneliest years of my life (2015) where I just wasn't right in the head, almost considered just ending it right there. Didn't really have any friends I could hang out with till 2016. Severely lacked any form of social skills or knowledge. 

Now, here I am, the majority of those problems just gone and out of the way. All because I kept true to myself and the promises I made. 

If someone like me can survive all that shit and make it to this point in life, then I'm pretty sure you can too. 

Wait, no, not pretty sure. 

I KNOW you can do it.

Just thought I'd share this. 

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade... or something I don't know

I was in kind of a bad spot during that time. Our cat Basco had just passed away during that time and I was under a shit-ton of stress. We're still coping with it and it's not easy, but we'll get by.

ANYHOW

I've returned to DA, and quite frankly, I can't see myself ever leaving this site permanently in the future. I've been a workaholic in the past couple months and just paid zero attention to this site (though that's obviously the smart choice lol), but as I've mentioned numerous times, I've also taken up a hobby of writing ever since November of 2017. I'd share it with you but it's pretty NSFW LOL.

Regardless, as much as I love writing, it drains the soul and energy and can leave a person feeling quite exhausted. I realised that I left a lot behind here. I mean I have, hopefully still, over 2300 watchers! 

You can't just leave that shit behind. I don't know wtf I was thinking. Must've been drunk at the time (actually grieving tbh). 

ANYWAY

I'm back! And I intend to stay on here for a long time. 

You know what they say.

LEGENDS NEVER DIE!